Years from now when I look back on living during the Coronavirus, chances are good that I will remember many ugly times- with potty training Luke being pretty darn high on that list.
Brian's famous last words, "Since you're stuck at home all the time now, why don't you just go on and potty train him?" Yes, in theory that's a great idea if you are not teaching the most stubborn person on earth how to do something he REALLY, REALLY, REALLY doesn't want to do.
So what I initially thought would be an easy process...(he's a boy- he can just learn to pee outside- I've already done this twice, etc.)- turned out to be the opposite. Turns out Luke can hold his bladder for a really long time. So we would just go in the bathroom and sit and read stories and talk and bribe with candy...and nothing. Then I would plead with him, explain the process one more time, and bribe with bigger items...nothing. I ordered a new toy cargo plane from Amazon...the vehicle he had picked out himself and desperately wanted, and it arrived...nothing. I would get the girls to go in there and show him how to do it and encourage him...nothing. We went underwear-less outside hoping it would just come out by accident and see that it was not a scary thing...nothing. We downed liquids in unnatural amounts...nothing. Then I would lose my patience and become a desperate woman and try anything (watch the ipad, eat a giant marshmallow Santa, whatever) to make him pee just a tiny bit in his penguin potty...nothing. After days of pleading with this tiny person, I finally decided to just wait it out. I just knew if we sat there long enough, he would have to go to the bathroom eventually. HOURS later this eventually turned out to be true, but it was a pretty ugly two hours. I was not proud of my parenting in those two hours, and I definitely lost my temper, but Luke FINALLY peed a little bit in the potty.
And that was just enough to show him that it was not a scary thing. And he could do it from then on out. But did those few days shave a few years off my life? I'm sure of it.
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