Addie had been telling us repeatedly that she didn't want to leave our house...that she loved her tree, her swing set, and her room. It was a little heartbreaking to hear her say this, but we kept reassuring her that she would love her new house despite all the changes. Well, I guess it's a little hard to understand all this when you are four and so our challenges with Addie began.
It started with her all of a sudden not wanting to go to school. Always my independent child, she has always walked confidently into her classroom and started playing. No more...she would start screaming once she found out it was a school day, and a two-year-old-style temper tantrum would ensue. I would have to drag her into her classroom. This lasted for a long time- EVERY Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for weeks. Sigh...it was not easy.
Then she became super clingy to me. Not letting me out of her eyesight- even to go to the bathroom or upstairs to get something. It was hard on both of us. And when she got upset, often times Luke would get upset too.
This carried over into her activities- not wanting to participate in gymnastics when she has always been so excited to go to her class. I had to beg and plead with her to go in, and being the stubborn one she is, she would dig her heels in and refuse. I was left wondering how in the world to deal with this problem.
The climax of our problem came when she didn't even want to stay with Gigi or Brian without me there.
The preschool director said moving was a "big one" when it came to kids developing separation anxiety, and that we should just be supportive and reassuring and keep with our routine and it would probably work itself out over time.
Well, thank goodness she was right. The big moving day finally arrived, and all the change we had talked about finally happened. We dealt with Addie's extreme separation anxiety for about six weeks in total, and then once we were settled in our new house, things slowly started to get back to normal.
She is still not totally free of it; she still says she doesn't want to go to school- she "just wants to stay with me all day"- but she will go in without crying. She will go off and play with friends freely and gets excited to go stay with Gigi.
I'm so far behind in posting on the blog, and we have now lived in our new house about 5 weeks. Since we've been here, Addie has told us repeatedly she likes our old house better. Can you tell my child is not big on change?
But last night, we had a turning moment. Out of the blue she declared, "Guess what? I like our new house better than our old house." SAY WHAT?? It was a huge victory in our little girl's struggle with anxiety and change and a big sigh of relief for us parents. Here's hoping this difficult phase is past, and we can move on to a new happy normal.
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